Honeymoon Trip Report: Magic Kingdom

EDIT: If you click on an individual picture if will give you the full size image (or at least a larger image). The quality of some of the in-text pictures is…bad.

Magic Kingdom is THE park to visit when you go to Disney World. There are so many classic attractions that we ended up spending the majority of our time there. Let’s get right to it.

Starting in Fantasyland (non-logical here) Snow White’s (Not so) Scary Adventure was gone. In its place will eventually be a Princess meet and greet but for now a large scrim covers it.

Dumbo has moved and doubled in size. It’s over in “Storybook Circus” by other yet-to-open attractions and Goofy’s Barnstormer. There is a big play area for the kids in the middle of the line. We decided to skip it but it could be very fun for kids. The only problem I see is getting them to leave when your buzzer goes off and it’s time for you to board the ride. Although I have heard if you go up to the desk they will swap your pager for a new one with more time on it.

Goofy’s Barnstormer had been re-themed and the queues were swapped. The lengthy entrance has been turned into the exit and the entrance queue is shorter now. The ride, however, is still the same length and very kid-friendly.

Is Google Street View available?

There were a lot of scrims and walls up around the back side of Fantasyland making way for the NEW Fantasyland.

The crane is a nice addition

Above the walls you can see Beast’s Castle and Eric’s Castle (?).

Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride

The first animal that comes to mind when thinking about this ride is not a toad. Instead, the image of a nice, fluffy sheep fixates itself in my mind.

For some odd reason, my father decided it would be funny to bah like a sheep throughout the entirety of the ride. As time went on it became a tradition: bah-ing while riding Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.

Eventually this matured (our immaturity matured that is) into bah-ing on just about ever indoor ride at Disney. The Peter Pan ride, the Snow White ride, Haunted Mansion…think of a slower indoor ride at Disney and we have bah-ed while riding it.

As far as the ride itself goes, Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride was as advertised: wild. I always loved the jerky motions and quick accelerations and braking during the ride.

To nowhere in particular

Besides that, it was risqué. I didn’t realize it at the time but there were some pretty mature themes throughout the ride. As a child I just liked that there were a bunch of colors and objects to look at as you flew around the inside of a building almost running into everything in your path.

Going on it now I’d compare it to riding in the car with a drunk driver while high on psychedelic mushrooms. Almost running into doors, walls, etc. and having them open up so you can pass through just in the nick of time always got me going (having my dad play up the excitement helped too). You get hit by a train (my favorite part), run into some questionable characters, go to Hell and back (literally) and see a mural of Rapunzel that, shall we say, looks a little different from the most recent reincarnation of the character by Disney.

If Rapunzel let's down her hair...

She must have a 14 inch waist

None of this is in chronological order of course seeing as I haven’t been on the ride in a good 15 years. I just remember a lot happened and I was always amped after going on the ride. While some of the imagery and themes in the ride were deemed mature and dark, I never thought of them that way. Maybe I was too young to actually think about what I was seeing and what they meant: I just rode it because it was fun.

I never connected the end of the ride with Hell. I just thought it was another part of the attraction. The little demons with their pitchforks, looking extra fierce and evil. Ominous may be a good word to describe the end of the ride. Sadness is a good word to describe the way I felt going to the Magic Kingdom to find Mr. Toad gone and Pooh and friends in his place.

Poor Mr. Toad

Sure, the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh is a good ride but it can’t compare to Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride. Apparently, it is consistently voted number one on which-ride-would-you-bring-back-at-Disney polls.

The only desire I have to go to Disney Land is so I can ride this again. I know it’s a little different ride but I really miss it: Bah-ing at Pooh and Tigger just doesn’t do it for me.

Magic Kingdom Skyway

The worst part of visiting Disney World (besides the herds of Brazilian teenage tour groups) is all the walking. One day of walking around the Magic Kingdom will have you wishing you were gellin’.

Gellin' like a felon

The genius that Walt Disney was, he found the perfect solution: a Skyway. Visitors to the Magic Kingdom could conveniently (wait in line for 15 minutes because it took forever to load) board a colorful pod suspended by one metal bar and glide atop the park, forgoing all the annoying walking normally necessary for the trek between Fantasyland and Tomorrowland.

Besides the fact that it would take about half the amount of time to walk it (thus burning off a few calories from all the food your cram down your cake-hole while on vacation at Disney), the feeling that at any second the car could disconnect from the cable suspended between each towering support and the nauseating up-and-down bouncing motion that occurred every time a new car left the station or surpassed a support, it was a GREAT ride.

I would include a photo of the actual pods, buckets, cars, whatever you want to call them, but all of the pictures I can find are from the ’70s.

There really isn’t much to say about the ride itself. It took you from Tomorrowland to Fantasyland. That’s it. It was cool (as long as you weren’t afraid of heights). It was convenient for families with small children. It’s gone now.

The station in Tomorrowland was only torn down a couple of years ago. Before that it served as a bathroom with a “forbidden” upstairs after the ride closed. I was actually quite fond of the building itself. I loved the little waterfall and I think it added to the aura of Tomorrowland as a whole.

There just aren't enough waterfalls at Disney anymore

The station in Fantasyland is still standing, a reminder of former childhood bliss. It still looks awesome sitting up on top of the little hill it is on. I always imagined that’s where the dwarves from Snow White lived.

A slap in the face to the building, it is now used for stroller parking, which, if I must complain about one thing at Disney now, it is the stroller parking. It is EVERYWHERE. Check that. Strollers are everywhere. There needs to be more strolling parking. Maybe they need multi-story automated stroller parking garages like you see in the movies for cars.

Your number one choice for prime stroller parking

In formation they look even more menacing

Alas, it seems as if all Skyways across the entire Disney World Parks spectrum have closed in an apparent attempt by Disney to help curb the obesity epidemic effecting (mostly America) the globe.

If walking from Tomorrowland to Fantasyland weren’t bad enough, the fact that the Strawberry Swirl is gone is thrown right in your face.

Strawberry Swirl

So simple yet so refreshingly delicious. The Strawberry Swirl at the Enchanted Grove refreshment stand was, among many things, a much-needed respite from the intense Central Florida heat.

A worthy tribute to the dessert Gods

From what I remember it was essentially a strawberry and vanilla ice cream swirl but it tasted like Heaven. As soon as I saw the Enchanted Grove appear on the horizon after walking through Tomorrowland I couldn’t contain my excitement.

The toxic smell of exhaust from Tomorrowland Speedway mixed with the heavy smell of fry oil and grease wafting over from Cosmic Ray’s was (although nostalgic now) a necessary evil in order to arrive at the dessert Mecca of the Magic Kingdom.

There’s nothing better than getting off a gut-wrenching, nauseating spin on the Mad Tea Party only to gorge yourself full of sugar. Because, really, there’s only one thing that makes a child happier than being at Disney World: sugar.

As with so many other classic Disney items, the Strawberry Swirl has vanished into the Disney abyss. In fact, those dorks even got rid of the Enchanted Grove in favor of a new place called The Cheshire Cat…granted, it is themed after Alice in Wonderland now – just like the Mad Tea Party next to it – which makes more sense, but I can still be bitter about it.

What next Disney? How many more childhood memories of mine will you crush with your soft, white, puffy mouse hand?

I would compose another post about the Enchanted Grove but since all we ever got there was the Strawberry Swirl, I wasn’t too fond of the building.

Rumors online say it may be brought back in a different restaurant but I don’t want to get my hopes up. Teasing somebody with the prospect of a Strawberry Swirl is like teasing a dog with a piece of food: it’s funny because he/she will never get it but it’s mean to give him/her false hope.